Aretha died and so did I today...

Days like this remind me of how much there is to do and how much I should keep to myself. In a perfect world I would have everything I feel I want or deserve but in this one. I find myself lacking everything but the sneaking feeling that I am not enough or doing enough. This may not be true but the feelings are.

At this point,  I'm tired of searching for the acceptance, love, and the energy to even fuel others dreams and my own. I want to give up on my own endeavors and just take the easy route. I want to soften my heart and feelings and not be let down. I want to work in a world where from my interactions you find I am something of value.

All this is fueled by an internal want/need for something or someone but today it's to the brim. Today I think I realized my dreams are the only things that will hold me up when everything else lets me down. They are my own and will mold themselves to save me from various aspects of life.